Prevent The Hangover

How I Help Myself Prevent An Emotional Hangover

Let me start by saying there is not just one way to cure an emotional hangover, for every person is different. Ideally, it all depends on your style of doing things and what type of personality you tend to adhere too. I know for myself that when its been a hard day with the kids and I am emotionally drained I try and start my night routine as early as possible (TRY is definitely the BOLD word here). It’s like drinking water inbetween alcoholic beverages. You are trying to lessen the day after blow. So if my day has left me hanging onto a string of sanity, I start winding down as soon as those precious little heads hit the pillow. Setting boundaries for myself with house chores, children and husband wants is important. I am important!

Thankfully, my husband and I have great communication. Which means he typically already knows when I am going to need the immediate pre-recovery. I say pre-recovery because we all know the emotional hangover hits a little awhile after the stressful situation is over. When I’m like what the heck happened to me! Like who was that person? Cringe…Anyways, my pre-recovery stage/self care typically includes: taking a nice long shower or bath, using essentials oils, getting into pajamas, doing my nighttime hygiene routine and jumping into the lounge chair next to my bed or honestly 80% of the time, straight under the covers. After taking my nighttime meds, I know I need to start mentally calming down. Here are some ways I have learned to do this in a healthy way. If I am not a raging B at this point then I will deliberate with my husband over the day and keep an open mind to feedback, taking myself out of the emotional and into the rational (which is hard most of the time, because of course I am always right!) lol. If I am not in the mood for a two-way convo then I will pray, write things down in my notes app on my phone, make lists of things I need to do tomorrow and look at them reasonably with my children’s schedule, rate my day good vs room for improvement (80% great day 20% these kids may not survive) or do a full body breathing exercise/taking inventory of the feelings in my body from head to toes (you can find examples on YouTube).

Of course there are days when these techniques don’t work and that’s called life. When I have these kinda days like I am a stubborn child who refuses to try to make things works, then down the rabbit hole I go. Ill let myself sink down to the depths of depression and the “my life would be better if” statements start. Normally, if I allow this to happen I reach out immediately for help ie; get my husband, text my therapist, call my pastor, text a friend who knows what I am going through. I don’t let my depression stew. I have come to the understanding that things change everyday, haha shocking right, naturally I don’t like this. I can not project or expect tomorrow to be the same as it was today. I have to remind myself when I am indulging in the self regret, hate thinking “drink,” who am I to sabotage tomorrow? I don’t have to be mentally hungover in bed tomorrow because I couldn’t control my thoughts. If I put in the work to minimize the blow by setting healthy boundaries, self advocating and doing self care that’s progress! The progress of getting off the couch, not regretting the horrible word vomit convo I had with a loved one, not carrying the baggage of the day before, not believing my children will be just as hard today as yesterday (but also preparing mentally for the suck; picking up toys, saying “No” a 100 times, listening to whining,) and back to loving and believing in my children, myself and my spouse…that is enough!

Meagan Hur 🖤